Form in Music

I'm starting to understand why so many composers have turned to artificial methods of material generation and predefined forms: Taking all the ingredients of a new composition and congealing them into a tasty and well-balanced stew is truly a challenge of epic proportions.

Listening to my recent works amongst well-worn musical sages this summer has revealed new things to me. Older composers, even if they lack in good ideas, seem to often have their proportions just "right." When I hear some of my pieces, I receive great satisfaction from them. Others bring frustration, however, as I can't get over litte things being just...not...right. Slightly too long here, slightly too short there, a bit too much major-triad harmony here... yet it all seemed "right" at the time. What is a well-intentioned composer to do?

My form issues are further complicated by my view on modern music aesthetics: I see no reason why serial harmony can't be mixed with Chopin-esque romantic gestures and the intensity of aleatoric music a-la Penderecki. There's no good reason not to attempt it -- but doing it well remains the major question in my artistic search.

In the end, I must believe that form in authentic art is based more on a natural sense of proportion more than any predefined formula. Hindsight is generally 20/20, and the trick seems to reside in getting things "just right" in the moment, and not upon a 30th re-listening of the recording. I can't seem to revise works after they've ripened, if only because that individual inspiration is no longer present. I can only hope to get better at this aspect of my craft as time moves on... and hopefully before I'm in my 50's.